As a woman who had breast cancer, I am invested in Elizabeth Edwards' health.
I remember when the news about her metastasized cancer burned through the airwaves and how opinions were formed in an instant. What was most disconcerting was the venomous criticism of her husband, John, as he continued his bid for the presidency.
While Elizabeth’s health is not consistently in the news, the venom against Edwards has not necessarily dissipated. He’s selfish, he has small children, yadayadayada. Of course he is selfish – he is running for president. His kids? He’s been a lawyer and a politician. What's different? A husband? Here he wins. He and Elizabeth believe in the power of dreams and in living each day. How do I know? We cancer dreamers recognize each other.
While Elizabeth’s health is not consistently in the news, the venom against Edwards has not necessarily dissipated. He’s selfish, he has small children, yadayadayada. Of course he is selfish – he is running for president. His kids? He’s been a lawyer and a politician. What's different? A husband? Here he wins. He and Elizabeth believe in the power of dreams and in living each day. How do I know? We cancer dreamers recognize each other.
One of the most difficult issues for those with breast cancer is the horror we bring to our families. Not only is the experience unplanned and unrequested but the outcome could be fatal. In one day a family's life is changed forever. How each family copes and struggles with dreams of survival is of no concern to anyone else.
I maintain that if people truly wish Elizabeth Edwards well, they will not question her decision to help her husband pursue the presidency. We don't know what shared dreams John and Elizabeth have. We don't know what triumph means to them. Could it be fully living with cancer and living in the white house?
You want to show support for a potential candidate's wife? Don't criticize her decisions. Send her love, ease and strength. And back off.
1 comment:
I completely agree with you, Gari. I weigh in not as someone who has had to deal with cancer but as an observer with various health issues and mostly one who believes in living life as fully as possible, every day. My parents died long ago and one outcome of losing loved ones, especially when young, is how life is so precious and unpredictable.
I admire Elizabeth Edwards for choosing to live as "normally" as she can and investing her time and energy in the future, both hers and her husband's. Again, as an observer, one gets the impression that they are close and share completely in each other's lives; how better to spend one's time and devote one's energies. Not only is this family but it is much bigger - in the interests of the entire country. It is beyond admirable.
-- Shelley
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